B-Sides 1

We usually say “thank you” after we receive something and got so much out of it. For me, I can’t stop saying thank you even if I know that there is nothing done yet, and this is only the beginning. Is it too early to say thank you?

Maybe, maybe not, but just being here already proved my worth. It made me see something in me, I can still go to new heights.

I remember back in March when I was taking the LANCE examinations, someone asked me why I was taking the exam. It was like, hey, just because I’m virtually unknown doesn’t mean I am deprived of the opportunity to be part of something special.

That person got into me a little bit and made me want to prove something. I came into the room that day only hoping to become at least a writer but after that person asked me that question, I was running on overdrive. I’m going to score high on this test. I will make it to the editorial board.

I felt like I was a man possessed, hungry to prove myself to everyone that has doubted me. So eager, that I will go ahead of them. It’s not arrogance, I call it confidence.

May 4 arrived and we got the examination results, and (obviously) I made it to the editorial board as the sports editor for The LANCE. I felt blessed and I am so thankful to be part of it. I remember during the interview, Sir Bana asked me what pushed me to make it that high for a newbie. I told him that I wanted to prove everybody that I belong.

It is also a blessing since I joined The LANCE to learn and grow as a soon-to-be professional, but to be in the place of the editors, the opportunity to teach others is also there.

Now I am on another level in terms of proving my worth. This is the stage where I need to prove that I’m no fluke and I deserve this one. Most importantly, as part of The LANCE and its editorial board, we need to publish ten quality issues.

Again, its not arrogance, I call it confidence. The blessing I have received certainly fell to me at the right time. Just when I needed something to make me feel that I still have value.

This means so much more to me than just working in the school paper, and having something to add in my resume. To simply put it, it’s about writing and enhancing that gift. This is something to answer all the questions doubters threw at me, and I’ll deliver emphatically.

The LANCE somehow sealed some parts of me being “enigmatic”, that despite my shaky personality and academic background, there is still talent in me worthy to be improved, something to outshine the negative spots in me.

I was labeled an enigma way back in high school by teachers, friends, classmates, and people beyond the four corners of the school. They may not have called me exactly as an enigma, but by their ways of defining me, that’s the only word that comes to mind. I could be someone out of this world by wonders in whatever task is given. Then I could also be this person so passive that it seems I don’t exert any effort. Somehow the passive image got stuck to people until it dragged me down. It made me crave for opportunities to prove myself, and the LANCE provided me with plenty of it.

Now, is it too early to say thank you? I say no. The only thing that I am trying to say here is, don’t waste your time by second guessing yourself about grabbing chances if you can develop your talents and character. Lastly, be thankful to the people directly or indirectly involved in leading you or even pushing you to grab great opportunities. Now, it is all on me to prove that I’m no disappointment.